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When I, amused, reveal the truth they simply shake their heads (oh, so knowingly! so sure!) and give the age old answers. Just wait, say they, it'll come in time. You're young yet, you're still a kid! Just wait and see, you'll change your mind. One day you'll find The (dreaded!) One and then you'll understand.
Understand.
Understand!
They say I'll 'understand', as if at the moment the concepts of lust and desire are beyond my childish brain; as if I do not realize what lingering gaze might bring two (or more? hah!) together, what kinship might make hearts race and passions flame. Is this such a complicated phenomenon, the act of falling in and out of love, in and out of bed (in and out of each other)?
If this is what they think of my decision (or destiny, fate, proclivity, orientation?) then they've misjudged by far. They must not realize we all take ninth grade health, sit through the awkward week of embarrassing diagrams and snickered innuendos. They must not realize the internet exists, or dime-store romance novels, or pathetic teenage poetry.
I understand. I 'get' it. I know how the parts fit together and I can imagine what it must be like, this twisted, confusing game of genders and sexes and mixed signals. It's simple, in fact, especially when one can observe from the outside, be far removed like a clipboard wielding scientist. Simple and, let me say from long experience and many pages of meticulous notes on the subject,
boring.
Forgive me for my judgment, but your little game of cat and mouse (or cat and cat, I do not judge preferences) is as boring as any 1980's board game with half the pieces missing. I know you spend copious amounts of energy pining over lost loves and unrequited affections, over the boy on the bus and the girl down the street, wondering if you should give chase or play it cool, wondering where it will go (how far, how fast?), and for this I can say I feel little more than disinterest. Your stories of soul mates and long nights of love making, of one-night stands and cheap, dirty sex do nothing for me. You won't win me over to your side with that famous phrase,
you'll change your mind!
Friend, let me tell you.
I won't. (And yes, I'm sure!)
I don't doubt that sex is great. I'm sure it's the cat's pajamas, the bee's knees, just fine and dandy and swell.
It just ain't for me. So don't tell me that one day I'll wake up and find myself blushing at the girl in the cafe or the boy at the library. Don't tell me I'll just know (another damnable phrase!), that my lips will curl into a smile and my legs will go weak and I'll feel 'that way'. I know I won't. Boys don't do it for me (eww, all that thrusting?), girls don't do it for me (yuck, all that drama?)...
Heck, I don't even do it for me!
And I don't mind one bit. I don't need your pity or the shaking of your head. Don't feel sorry for me, for this; my life's all the less complicated for it. Go have your petty romances - I'll be watching TV.
Understand.
Understand!
They say I'll 'understand', as if at the moment the concepts of lust and desire are beyond my childish brain; as if I do not realize what lingering gaze might bring two (or more? hah!) together, what kinship might make hearts race and passions flame. Is this such a complicated phenomenon, the act of falling in and out of love, in and out of bed (in and out of each other)?
If this is what they think of my decision (or destiny, fate, proclivity, orientation?) then they've misjudged by far. They must not realize we all take ninth grade health, sit through the awkward week of embarrassing diagrams and snickered innuendos. They must not realize the internet exists, or dime-store romance novels, or pathetic teenage poetry.
I understand. I 'get' it. I know how the parts fit together and I can imagine what it must be like, this twisted, confusing game of genders and sexes and mixed signals. It's simple, in fact, especially when one can observe from the outside, be far removed like a clipboard wielding scientist. Simple and, let me say from long experience and many pages of meticulous notes on the subject,
boring.
Forgive me for my judgment, but your little game of cat and mouse (or cat and cat, I do not judge preferences) is as boring as any 1980's board game with half the pieces missing. I know you spend copious amounts of energy pining over lost loves and unrequited affections, over the boy on the bus and the girl down the street, wondering if you should give chase or play it cool, wondering where it will go (how far, how fast?), and for this I can say I feel little more than disinterest. Your stories of soul mates and long nights of love making, of one-night stands and cheap, dirty sex do nothing for me. You won't win me over to your side with that famous phrase,
you'll change your mind!
Friend, let me tell you.
I won't. (And yes, I'm sure!)
I don't doubt that sex is great. I'm sure it's the cat's pajamas, the bee's knees, just fine and dandy and swell.
It just ain't for me. So don't tell me that one day I'll wake up and find myself blushing at the girl in the cafe or the boy at the library. Don't tell me I'll just know (another damnable phrase!), that my lips will curl into a smile and my legs will go weak and I'll feel 'that way'. I know I won't. Boys don't do it for me (eww, all that thrusting?), girls don't do it for me (yuck, all that drama?)...
Heck, I don't even do it for me!
And I don't mind one bit. I don't need your pity or the shaking of your head. Don't feel sorry for me, for this; my life's all the less complicated for it. Go have your petty romances - I'll be watching TV.
Literature
Sexualities and Gender ID
The Wonderful World of Sexual Orientations and Gender Identity
Anyone who has tried to figure out their sexual and gender identity in the world know that this is such a confusing topic and with the added fact that there are so many labels out there nowadays it just adds to the confusion. Gone are the days where people used only straight, gay, and bisexual or man and woman. Sexuality and gender are a spectrum and not something that is black and white. Human sexuality can also be a rather fluid making it even harder to define who you are.
One of the first concepts a person needs to understand while going through this confusing journey is that
Literature
Asexual love
Next to each other, we lay, eyes looking skywards. The deep green grass tickles my skin while the moisture of morning dew hangs in the air. I turn my head and she turns hers. Our eyes meet, and at once, we feel the connection that has sparked so long ago. Both of us had felt that powerful connection, in which the souls meet, not just our eyes.
Shyly, she holds out her hand and I eagerly take it. Together, our fingers twine. Her warmth is soothing. I feel no lust, as much as she is beautiful for even now, there is no need for lust. Only love.
Our sides begin to touch. I wrap my free arm around her in an odd sort of hug. She giggles softly
Literature
A Tribute to Homosexuality
A Tribute to Homosexuality
Some say its sickening.
Some find it revolting.
Some say it's against God.
Some say it's against Nature.
Some think it's all lust.
Some think it's rebellion.
I do not.
If it's love, how can it be sick?
How can it revolt you?
How can love be against Nature?
Are they simply to ignore their feelings?
That is impossible.
How do you know what they feel?
Would you really pull two lovers apart?
They love despite outside hatred,
They truly see past the outer core.
Forbidden love is the deepest,
Because you must strive to keep it.
Its heartache is great,
But when you bring two lovers together,
There is
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Edit 2: I wrote a longer essay on asexuality, so check it out! [link] 
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Edit: Wow! I'm overwhelmed by all the positive feedback I've been getting about this piece! I never expected so many people to identify with what I wrote. All your comments have made me SO happy and I love hearing about your opinions on asexuality. It's really comforting and encouraging to know how many people feel the same way I do and are going through some of my same experiences (or close). I'm so glad to hear from you guys! :3
----
A short, quick piece on asexuality. This isn't meant to be preachy or anything, just simple and silly. I always have fun telling people I'm asexual and then watching them go "....wait.... o.o;; Soooo, like... you... don't want sex?" (as if that's the weirdest thing ever) while I try to explain what asexuality is. The piece, obviously, is a semi-rant about the responses I always get, but they never bother me. I LOVE being asexual - it gives me liberty (at least in my eyes XD) to make overly sexual comments to anyone, male or female, that I feel like. Good fun.
(Also, have no idea if this is under the right category.)
Shameless self-promotion: [link]
----
Edit: Wow! I'm overwhelmed by all the positive feedback I've been getting about this piece! I never expected so many people to identify with what I wrote. All your comments have made me SO happy and I love hearing about your opinions on asexuality. It's really comforting and encouraging to know how many people feel the same way I do and are going through some of my same experiences (or close). I'm so glad to hear from you guys! :3
----
A short, quick piece on asexuality. This isn't meant to be preachy or anything, just simple and silly. I always have fun telling people I'm asexual and then watching them go "....wait.... o.o;; Soooo, like... you... don't want sex?" (as if that's the weirdest thing ever) while I try to explain what asexuality is. The piece, obviously, is a semi-rant about the responses I always get, but they never bother me. I LOVE being asexual - it gives me liberty (at least in my eyes XD) to make overly sexual comments to anyone, male or female, that I feel like. Good fun.
(Also, have no idea if this is under the right category.)
Shameless self-promotion: [link]
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Comments119
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Through the looking glass I've witnessed sex, and it's overall consequences, do more harm than good. I've watched friends and relatives go into severe depression, have mental breakdowns and some have even committed suicide it puts things into perspective.